Monday, November 30, 2009

Success Principle Three for the Care Giver: Persistence

Care giving for someone with a terminal illness can often leave the care giver feeling like they want to run for the hills.

At one time or another, all of us have dreampt (or will dream) of different ways to escape, it's human nature.  We fantasize about a one way plane ticket or a drive to nowhere, just as long as it's far, far, away from the insanity that has become your life with the arrival of Lewy. 

I'm personally living with my mom who has Lewy Bodies Dementia, an illness that I see as one of the mind and spirit.

What I have learned through out life is that we can always run from our perils, but we can never hide.  It took me years before I realized that I create all the peril in my own mind. 

I hold the key to free myself from guilt, shame or any other really nasty vibe that can bring me down. 

Realizing this simple belief that I have always cherished and applying it to my duties as a care giver, my care giving got easier. 

Even the crazy days, the bad days that come with the Lewy Bodies Dementia, even those insane days are easier. 

I am chosing how I wish to react and feel.  Only I can shift how I think about care giving, no one can do it for me.

It's really all about love, everything that a care giver does, comes from the heart.  It's an honorable act being a care giver to someone who's only real outcome is a ride in a hurse or resting on a mantle in a fancy jar.

I'm finding that when I approach caregiving from an angle of, "how can I be a successful care giver?" my life feels lighter, I feel free even though nothing has really changed except one thing, my mind. 

I have freed myself of burdens through love and how I chose to perceive the blessing of being able to care for my mom.  I'm learning from her still, even now in her 80th year she is teaching me more about love than I ever thought possible.

The result, it's a happier life for me and everyone who lives with my mom.

It does take persistence though, the 3rd principle of becoming successful with anything. 

I am very persistent when it comes to my mom's illness and with believing in the power I hold with in myself. 

I believe that we can stop the progression of Lewy Bodies.  I have believed this from the beginning, even though everything that I read states the opposite, that there's no cure and the prognosis of a peaceful death for my mom are slim.

But... I refuse to believe it. 

I believe in miracles. 

I believe in the miracle that is me who has the ability to move mountains and solve any problem that is presented in my path. 

Persistence is the fertilizer for my soul to keep on keeping on.

“Success is almost totally dependent upon drive and persistence. The extra energy required to make another effort or try another approach is the secret of winning.”


Dennis Waitley

1933-, American Author, Speaker, Trainer, Peak Performance Expert
Care givers that are persistent win.  

We win the big prize, the unspoken prize that only the care giver knows and understands.  It's a prize which we can't describe in words.  We gain so much as care givers.  Is it peace of mind, knowing that we did all that we could?

I don't know for sure, I haven't gotten to the end of my journey with my mom yet.  I do know that there's no better reward for me than when she wakes up from a great night sleep, ready for a good day.

I'm honored to have been given the opportunity to chose this path, it is not always easy but it can get easier. 

I have discovered that care giving for the love of it, especially for someone with Lewy Bodies Dementia can make the difference between a good day or a bad day. 

Good days and bad days really begins with us, the care giver.  Our emotions have a powerful affect that can be felt through space and time.  It's all about us as care givers and how we chose to approach our love for the person.

This week I began following a blogger who's writing makes me laugh.  I find laughter to be so important for good health, especially when care giving to a crazy person.

Yesterday, I read Josh's blog post and it was a video.  I rarely watch videos on blogs because I usually leave the sound turned off so that I don't wake anyone in the house, especially at 3am.  This video post, I needed to watch, I felt compelled to watch.

You see, Josh, the World's Strongest Librarian, has Tourette's and he's a librarian! 

His message is on point with the topic of my blog post today, persistence.  Never giving up on yourself.  The power to achieve anything, even respite in your own mind, is possible when you persist. 

Visit Josh's blog and watch his video, it's heart opening. 

Persistence allows people to accomplish and achieve greatness in their short lives on Earth. 

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